Adagio (Death, in slow time)

I frantically cling on to your trembling hands.
Sticky from sweat and tears, they begin to slip away.
Misty eyes meet, and you look at me, all too knowingly.
“No… No. I won’t let go,” I tearfully promise you.

“I WON’T LET YOU GO!” I call out, in mad, hopeless desperation.
But as soon as the words are uttered,
Shrill echoes of broken promises mock me,
And your tenebrous shadow diminishes.

You spiral downwards into the endless abyss.
The Dark Angel ruthlessly snatches a myriad of dreams,
And smothers you into nothingness.
You vanish behind the curtain of death.

Seething at the injustice, the apoplectic sky cracks open,
And a shower of rain foolishly challenges hellfire.
A cloudburst of cataclysm lashes down.
Wisps of smoke veil your limp body as they carry you to the empyrean.

What is this pathos?!
Where are you?
Wrap your arms around me, why won’t you?!
I inadvertently swallow fumes and inhale the waters of Lethe.

A strange void.
Why am I in tears?
Emptiness engulfs me whole.
How am I breathing even while I am drowning?

Namya R

Amrita School of Engineering

http://www.namya.tumblr.com/

TOPIC: It will heal with time; Maybe

A ray of hope!!

Thoughts are wandering too far off ends,
Confused became life in a couple of seconds.
Differentiation between the real and fake 
was becoming difficult to make.

Reading minds is not in your hands,
Except that someone gave you a magic wand.
Is the confusion just in the head?
Or is the relationship actually coming to an end.

A different approach should be tried this time
So that you can say ”the game is going to be mine”.
Not to worry, not to fear,
As a stable life should be dearer.

With a witty brain the battle should be fought,
With the lesson that has just been taught.
You will be the winner be assured
As true efforts are never ignored !!

Nirali Merchant

K.J.Somaiya College of Engineering

TOPIC: It will heal with time; Maybe

Marooned with you!!!

Days were long, 
Night never came….
Where in nature’s lap 
Strength and endurance were soul mates ,
Where difference between life and death 
Was an eighth sign of zodiac ,
Where a single smile 
Made thousand flowers blossom ,
Where one’s sight created an everlasting joy ,
Where ‘I’ was used as ‘you’ ,
Where sleeping on 
Unclothed earth in shade of sky
Taught me the essence of LOVE…

 

Ravikant Singh

NIFT

TOPIC: What I learnt in those 5 Mins

GREY

“Life is too complex. Nothing can be perfect in life, what can be good for one can be worst for another” 

Every girl dreams of her “prince charming”- the character appearing in a number of fairy tales, he is the prince who rides a white horse, handsome and romantic being his prime characteristics; he comes to the rescue of the damsel in distress and saves her from the evil. In a nutshell, he is the “perfect one”. The act of perfection seldom has a perfect meaning- it’s different for everyone. For some perfection is a mere art of doing things in the best way possible while for others it’s more or less a concept of rocket science where a small mistake can be fatal. How do we find a perfect definition of perfection is the question??

The act of being perfect requires a brief expounding so that it claims a locus standi in the minds of people who claim to be perfect. Every man on earth has been blessed with two facets- one godly and the other evil. In my opinion, while the godly element pushes us to do good, the evil forces us towards negativity. These two elements are always hovering near our shoulders- the angel on the right and the devil or demon on the left. The angel represents conscience and the devil representing temptation, easily shows the inner conflict of our character. We all being made of same flesh and bone, face this situation in our everyday lives and this defines a simple fact nothing is black or white- we all have the shades of grey.

The rudiment entails that Adolf Hitler, a man known for his tyrannical rule wanted to become a painter in his early teenage years. Embittered at his rejection by the Viennese Academy of Fine Arts he adopted a view of life which changed very little in the ensuing years, shaped as it was by a pathological hatred of Jews and Marxists, liberalism and the cosmopolitan Habsburg monarchy. Imagine a young painter turning into a cruel destructor!! The act was perfect in terms of destruction; the good side being overpowered by bad and still Hitler was a hero for many. All of us crave for perfection, right??

An important facet of this issue still needs emphasis. Prima facie the proposition in the proposed question appears to be innocent but it isn’t so in reality. We have numerous examples of how and when our historical heroes displayed their shades of grey, the best example being Lord Rama. His personality enamours me- the way he stood out as a cynosure in this deep, gloomy world and yes, didn’t think for a second before sentencing his pregnant wife a lifelong exile. This being done, listening to a futile gossip. I apologize if that means I’m hurting someone’s religious sentiments but then where was the “hero”??

The fast nailed truth is, “Too much light blinds us; too much noise deafens us; too great a distance prevents our view; too much love spoils its effect.” Too much good is as fatal as too much of bad and when it comes to judging between a good man and a bad man; I would preferably say both are man. The importance of goodness or badness can be denied with a slighting sneer and a similar concept applies for perfection. Everyone is both good and bad. We proudly veil the evil within us achieving the state of perfectionism and this is what disturbs the cycle of life. We love watching our bright end forgetting what we are, when we lie under the darker side of penumbra.

Therefore, the next time whenever we judge a person’s character; trying to define a clear line between the good and the evil we must remember that no such line exists. A person should be accepted the way he is and not wishing to change him into someone else. Like a point can be seen from 360 degree different angles, a good thing can never remain good and a bad thing cannot be bad forever. A man’s character is neither good nor bad; it’s a combination of two in varying proportions; thus displaying the shades of grey.

Garima Saxena

hebesglome@gmail.com

Lessons from a student…

Well, college life is all about freedom anticipation of future and a feeling that “yes I have graduated from school literally.”And for me I learnt this most important lesson as a student and later as a teacher also. When I first entered the classroom I noticed one particularly shy and meek student sitting at the back of the classroom obviously trying to avoid any kind of attention from all and most of all the formidable teachers. ( Every Teacher is formidable and scary for just out of school students, Isn’t it?) I did notice her but went on with formal introductions as usual and tried to break the ice, succeeded with most except that one student.

The days passed by and students at first made fun of the way she dressed, talked or sat. Later on they started ignoring her. I saw her eating her meals all alone. I could see that where as college was fun for others it was an unimaginable ordeal for her. I wanted to help but was clue less about how to bring her out of her shell. she intrigued me and others advised me to mind my own business .Ironical as A teacher Was I just supposed to teach and forget all other things? But this is what I did thinking that if she wanted to discuss she will come on her own as I did not know How to breach this subject. One day while passing through the one of the classrooms I found that child sitting alone and staring in space. i could not stop myself and went to her but was met with ressistance and silence. I walked away thinking that I tried. Next day I came to know that she had taken ill and would not come to college for few days which was unusual for her as she was the most regular student of my class. When she came back she was even quieter. This time when I asked her she told me the most touching story. She had suffered a traumatic childhood. Her mother had died at a young age and she was supposed to take care of household chores at this age and had no friends to s hare her woes with and father had no time for her. her grades suffered, she was constantly living under shadow of her smart, pretty cousins, classmates and was a source of embarrassment for her father, who avoided her further. She had even attempted suicide twice and was suffering from depression. My heart went out to that child. After listening to her I learned the most important lessons of my life. 

1) Why are we so stringent when showing love and compassion whereas we display anger so very easily. WE CAN AT LEAST GREET EVERYONE WITH A SMILE EVERYONE HAS THEIR OWN BAGGAGES.

2)I used to complain about so many little things in life when I had plenty to be grateful about , I had a loving family and group of trusted friends who would stand by me any time.

That student taught me more than I had taught her as a Teacher. Today after regaining her self confidence and faith she works for a prestigious firm and is leading a successful life.

Mona Vyas

TOPIC: What I learnt in those 5 Mins

Fluctuating love

Everyday when my electronic heart beeps;
Before clicking “read”,
I prefer tossing a coin,
To have an inkling of
what my love would bring me today.

After reading those deciding words;
I remind my eyes,
Of those intoxicating days,
When love was at its peak.
Reminiscence of our togetherness,
When we had three hands and,
One soul;
Soothes my wounded tears.

Sometimes my luck favors my love;
When I am missed,
Needed,
Desired to be loved forever.
Those graphical yet so warm
hugs, hallucinating voice,
That one enticing call just for
saying, “I love you!”;
Pulls me from within.
Sends me back to the place,
With open arms and smile,
Where once I wept.

Doesn’t want me to love him,
And never allows me to leave.
I am addicted to his game of love,
Where I always play to lose…

Ms.V U

M.I.I.T

TOPIC: It will heal with time; Maybe

WHY?

Hears the call
Lets them cry
See the sight
Shut my eye

Wish to say
Find no word
Listens the silence
Everything unheard

Learns to walkover
Always step aside
Wants to be there
Obstructed by pride

Knows the truth
Still ask questions
Face the fact
Change perception

No search and chase
Learns to find
When gets answers
Loses own mind

Lost in crowd
Swept by wave
Wants to emerge
Out of the grave

Walks in dark
Course unknown
Trace the path
Navigates alone

Want to live free
Fight no war
Why can’t i be 
MY OWN STAR?

Aparajita Singh

TOPIC: Grey

LOST !!!!

(This was a letter i had written when i was like really feeling lonely and wanted that special someone back into my life. But i guess she was too busy to ever read it . there is no special reason as to y i am sending this to u but well this it’s just a part of me i never showed before and i guess this needs to see the light of day thanks for spending a few minutes )

Hey there again,

I can see you in the chat bar but also know that the moment i try to chat, u will go invisible and then remove me from contacts and block my mails. Not saying that u still can’t do it but just a request please don’t and by the way i knew u would be online at this time so i came to the computer centre which is quite a walk from the hostel.

Kaisi ho avi? Yaaar just tell me this does blocking me do u any good apart from the fact that u no longer have to see it as a missed cal on ur phone and that i don’t disturb u when u are busy with ur handsome at heart boyfriend. No offence intended if u are thinking on those lines but yaar tell me this all of this semester when i had the uninor no. ur phone used to be switched off most of the time. and the only time it came on was when u expected a call from me but well i never knew when exactly did u switch it on .

I know u must think y the hell am i again and again bringing up old worn out topics for no other reason than to depress you. I know dear but believe me my intention is not to blame u or tell u7

It’s just that i can’t believe that how things have changed from way back then. I guess our journey can be told in this fashion…

I was friends with 99********
I got close to 98********
I was proposed on landline
I was intimate with 82********
I talked free on BHEL no. ***
I ran away from 75********
and
I was shattered by 97********

It’s one thing to not talk to some one and completely different to not love that person earlier due to skool pressure i couldn’t then later due to IIT. I admit to have made a lot of mistakes in life quite a few of them for which you had to suffer believe me avi i’m suffering enough now to understand pretty much how you must have felt after my abandon; but dear (yeah i know u must feel saala jab bhi mistake accept karta hai ek na ek BUT beech mein le hi aata hai) I was too broken to consider anything at all . yaar i felt i had lost eveything i let my parents , my friends , my teachers , myself and i let u down too. 

You know just before the results were declared my teachers in Brilliant had contacted me saying that” please aaj raat tak apne photos main centre mein mail kar dene ke liye so that the next days papers could cary my name with photograph and the rank that i had btained in clearing iit jee ” imagine what i felt when i couldn’t clear it that too by just 10 marks. It hurts even today. What with guys like vishal ranjan clearing it on account of their being a reserveed category clearing it.

I lost it avi i completely lost it i am not very good at accepting defeat by just a few inches . and i decided to cut off from everyone rom everyone who i had loved or who loved me and the stuff i told u about suicide i tried it too all i can say it didn’t work. 

I didn’t throw u out of my life avi it is not possible to throw someone out whom u love whom u have have shared three years of ur life with u know avi 28th july will have the same importance for me every year like it used to til now , just that now it will be a lonely day and rightly so cause you have now gotten a new date for a new anniversary
with a new someone special. 

Can’t really blame you for moving on . i just want your forgiveness avi cause i really really love u and always will tum hamesha bolti thi na ki i only tell u that i love u when i’m on the phone with u but never in front of others . well the reason i could never say cause i felt so i don’t knw the right word for it but i was unable to express my feelings in public i am never able to kind of a version of stage fright where i am too much influenced by others opinions of me i know this sounds like loser but then that is what i am i’m not as great a guy as him cause i have always been loser and mos probably will always be . u might wonder again as y am i telling all this now well cause i just want to make a clean breast of everything. 

U remember asking me to sing and i never used to cause it was because i have such a pathetic voice and u are like a really skilled singer with a magnificent voice and all and u used to tell me about this guy and gal in music class who sing this way and that way that it made me so consious that i never could sing. i tried to gain confidence by humming on the phone but saala koi fark nahi pada to my loserdom. 

Then again u know something tumhare kisi bhi no. pe jab bhi call karte the and till now the breathlessness and anticipation of hearing ur voice always makes my adrenaline levels go through the roof cause i was and am still addicted to ur voice. there is some inherent sensuality in ur voice that drives me crazy even when u sometimes scold me.

Yaar thee are so many things about u that i have loved ,hated,despaired,felt jealous,felt proud and almost the entie spectrum of human emotions. i never used to say it and always used to ignore u cause there were many idiots who used to tell me that the more attention u pay to a girl the more conceited she will get . i thought that if i showed indifference to u u would try and make urself more closer too me. i guess i overdid it owing to school teachers and thus instead of u being close to me u are with someone else now. it’s true fat guys never balance well and it shows i never could balance ur love . guess it’s too late to make amends now.

And now comes the most beautiful part and sadly the part which u regret the most. sometimes i feel yaar y is it that the most precious moments on earth with the person i truly am in love with considers it as just as a mistake and that i used her. really tins if there was a time when u saw my feelings for u completely it was then , i just never could get enough of u , u are like the drug that i was in unlimited supply of and u know avi i have said it before and i say it yet again still feel the heat of your body running through me as i hug my blanket again and the soft whimpers of protest with desire in ur voice sound like fresh music in my ears yet again .all those times u and i said our feelings on the phone now it’s like whenever i hear u ajeeb lagta hai agar i love u nahi boloon thats y most of the times nikal jata hai .i still remember the taste of ur lips ur cheek ur every body pat that i felt with my lips even ur hairstrand that u brushed into my f ace when we were lying together . had i told u that the avantika pillow back in delhi is the one that i have brought here too inspite of having lied to u so many times of having ton it and stuff. along with all the phone conversations i ever recorded of u. sometimes these are the things that keep me going here.when ur phone used to be switched off i used to talk to my pillow and love her and tell her that i really really want her with me and thus kissing her and consoling myself i used to go to sleep u know if the only thing i attribute being my strength that my memory power is too strong to ever get rid of these feelings 

The computer centre closed down at twelve aand again a long walk in the cold back to the hostel is especially haunting when ur mind is full of stuff that was suppressed for so long and u don’t know what the hell happened and by are u still here talking to someone for whom ur existence is nothing but a bane

Earlier jab kabhi bhi tumse sunte the ki tum aaj raat ko isse baat kar rahi thi and that so and so guy called you in the wee hrs of the night i don’t know i used to have feel anger literally gushing through my veins, wanting to kill that person for contacting my beloved avi. but now for the past two days whenevever i hear that the no. is busy like at this present moment at 1:30 am in the morrning just a few hrs before my cp endsems there is no anger now just a numb feeling, a heaviness in the heart. i try avi , i try in vain to cry out to let tears gush out so that maybe crying out will lessen the pain but no tears come out i’m just too shattered to have a any tears .

Well u asked what was i doing instead of studying… Well dear i was trying to compose parts of a song which tells exactly how i feel… It goes as…

Now that it’s all said and done
i can’t believe u were the one 
to build me up and tear me down 
like an old abandoned house 

words u said 
when u left
with him around
you now
left me cold
and out of breath 
i fell too far
and way too deep 
guess i let u get the best of me 

well i never saw it coming 
should’ve started running
a long long time ago
and i never thought to doubt u 
never thought i will be without u
more than,u more than u 
could ever know
slowly getting tortured
as u are moving forward
and i’m getting worser
picking up the pieces
fixing all the bruises
putting my heart back together
cause the day i thought
i’ll be there with u 
i got a goodbye from 
you ……..

u took a hammer to these walls
threw the memories across the hall
forgot it all and walked away 
and there was nothing i could say
and when u closed all contact shut
loads of others opened up
for me
but now i see that u were
always the best for me

well i never saw it coming 
should’ve started running
a long long time ago
and i never thought to doubt u 
never thought i will be without u
more than,u more than u 
could ever know
slowly getting tortured
as u are moving forward
and i’m getting worser
picking up the pieces
fixing all the bruises
putting my heart back together
cause the day i thought
i’ll be there with u 
i got a goodbye from 
you ……..

well i never saw it coming 
should’ve started running
a long long time ago
and i never thought to doubt u 
never thought i will be without u
more than,u more than u 
could ever know

can’t put my heart back together 
and i don’t know what to do 
these few days without u 
know that u r better 
i wish i was the guy 
and u my princess
but am stuck here 
and darkness keeps closing in 
know we’ll never be never be together …………………………………….

Its been more than 4 hrs writing this mail and i still have so much left to tell u that i guess that even if i was still in a relationship with u i would not have been able to tell u everything. love is really strange isn’t it it brings out the side in you that u never knew ever existed and i guess o bring that side out in me i have no on else to thank but you tins my love now and for a long time (and i mean a long time not something like a couple of months).

My roomie is giving me kicks on my ass and is telling to go to sleep so that atleast i get some marks to pass in the exam tomorrow and here I am still typing away to glory cause there are some things that hold as much importance as u do for me avi. 

I just want to tell u that u may have blocked me now and perhaps will change ur no. according to his operator in order to be able to talk as much a s possible with the minimum balance i can do nothing else but accept the fact that u indeed have moved on and that am nothing but a bitter memory for u that if given a chance you would erase forever.

I LOVE U and will always do a pity that i never could tell it all to u 
I am still not to terms with it but i want to wish u all the best for ur new life with him.

Just one last thing u have my no. u have my delhi no. you have my name and address and you know my email address so please feel free whenever and if u want to talk to me ever in life i’ll always be there for u just shout and i’l be there . that’s a promise .

As the temperature drops to below 10 in Pilani am here outside the hostel typing and

I just wish ……………

You and I ………………………….

Foto Panda

anubhavdas1993@gmail.com

BITS PILANI

TOPIC: It Will heal with time; Maybe

The Dream

Deep down somewhere in my heart
I had a wish to touch the sky
Before the night turns into dawn
I dreamt to fly.

I struggled to keep myself strong
Promised myself never will I cry
To forget the past and think of the present

Was the only focus of my

While I was still dreaming 
In my thoughts came a fairy

My face suddenly broke into a smile
And gone were the thoughts that were scary.

The night was over and so was my dream
I welcomed the new day
Wondering what my dream was all about
I had no clue what to say.

Deep down somewhere in my heart
I had a wish to touch the sky
Before the night turns into dawn
I dreamt to fly.

Nirali Merchant

K.J.Soamiya College of Engineering

TOPIC: What I learnt in those 5mins

 

 

 

मेरे दोस्त

कविता ,
कहाँ से शुरू करूँ
यही सोच रहा हूँ
सुबहा के ठीक 4.38 बजे
नींद?
हाँ याद आया
तुम कहते हो मुझे
रात के १-२ बजे तक
सो जाना चाहिए
की सेहत के लिए

अछा नही होता
रात को जागना

पर आज नही मेरे दोस्त
आज कुछ कहना चाहता हूँ मैं
कुछ बताना चाहता हूँ
कि मेरे मन के भाव
तुम्हें पता होने चाहिए
शायद,तुम्हें ये पता हों
या हो सकता है
मेरा व्यक्तित्व
ही कुछ कमजोर हो

मेरे दोस्त ,
१२ जून २०१० कि रात के बाद
नींद नही आती मुझे
या कह लो
डरता हूँ मैं सोने से
नामुमकिन सा है

मेरे हमसाए ,
आज भी याद है
मुझे वो रात
जैसे कल ही बात हो
१२ जून २०१०
जब आखरी बार देखा था उसे
जब आखरी बार
मैने वो डर महसूस किया था
जो मैं हमेंशा मसूस करता
उसके साथ होने पर
तुम सोचोगे की
उसकी बात के बिना
मेरी कोई कविता
पूरी नही होती
पर एसी भी
कोई कविता नही
जिसमें तेरी बात ना आए

तुम ने उस रात
उसके काँपते होठ
नही देखे ,
या एक आजीब सा दर्द
जो उसकी आखों में था
क्या करूँ कैसे भूल जायूं
उसके आखरी वाक्य
जब उसे पता था
अंत करीब है
कितनी ही कोशिश
करता हूँ
पर फिर भी याद हैं मुझे

“जाने दो मुझे
आज मत रोको
छोटा सा जीवन
बाकी है
उसे जीना चाहता हूँ
पूरे जोश,
होसले से
हाँ वादा करता हूँ
की आखरी सांस
आपकी बाहों में ही लूँगा ”
तू ही बता
कोई भूल सकता है इन्हें?

मेरे दोस्त
हो सकता है
तुम्हें ये कविता
बेतुकी सी लगे
या तुम इसे पड़ो ही ना
पर मैं तुम्हें कहना चाहताहूँ
की तुम ठीक ही कहतेहो
“की कोई आए
या ना आए
तुझे कोई फ़र्क
नही पड़ता”
तुम्हें एक दोस्त
के रूप मे बहुत
प्यार किया है मैंने
ओर तुम्हें “साथी”
कहने की तंमना है
बस

मेरे दोस्त
मुझे आज भी याद हैं
वो हमारा घंटों -२
प्यार की बातें करना
तुम्हारा हर पेज पे “एम”
ओर मेरा “आइ” लिखना
फिर उसके बाद समये आया
की हमने पहचाना
दुनिया का करूप-विरूप चेहरा
ओर चाहा
की कुछ भी हो
इस स्माज को बदलना ही होगा
ओर मुझे याद है
पहली बहस
३० की मार्केट के सामने
जब मैने कहा था
“दोस्ती के लिए
एक जैसे विचार होना
ज़रूरी है”
ओर तुम्हारा कहना था
“हो सकता है की एसा हो
अगर मैं कहीं रुक गया
तो खींच कर ले चलना
मुझे ”

क्या करूँ
समझ नही आता
मकड़ी के जाले से
उलझे विचार हैं
तुम्हे याद हैं
वो दिन
जब सब कुछ
साफ था मेरे लिए
वो मेरा लोगों से
घंटो बहस करते जाना
जीवितों की दुनिया
क़ि बातें करना
तेरी वो उस वक्तकी
आखरी बात भी याद
है मुझे
“कुछ समय चाहिए
मुझे ,इस सफ़र पर
निकालने से पहले”
अभी भी इंतज़ार है
मुझे तुम्हारा

मेरे दोस्त
ज़्यादा मत सोचो
सफ़र की तायारियों
के बारे में
बस फिसल जाओ
जैसे फिसलते हैं बर्फ पर
छा जाने दो खुद पर
इस अंतहीन
सागर का नशा
जिसे सिर्फ़ हमे
साथ२ पार करना है
पर तुम्हें
रोक रहें हैं
बासी रिश्ते,
कमजोर दोस्तिया ,
पतंगे,टिड्डे
कुएें के मेंडक

मेरे दोस्त
तुम्हें लगता है
मैं चिड जाता हूँ
छोटी२ बातों पर
ओर मुझे गुसा आता
है जब तुम ठीक होते हो
पर मुझे तो
गुस्सा आता है
ये देखकर की छोटी२
कभी ना ख़तम होने
वाली हर रोज़ की
ग़लतिया ही नज़र
हैं तुम्हें ,
मेरे लिए
तुमसे बिना मतलब की बातें करना
या जोक्स सुनना सुनाना
या मोबाइल की बातें
या तुम से ना मिलना
या तुम्हारे होते हुए
गेम खेलना
या फिर समये पर
ना आना
सब बराबर है
इन सब चीज़ो
से छिड़ होती है
तंग आ गया हूँ
इंससे

ओह कुछ ज़्यादा ही लम्बी
हो गयी बातचीत
पर फ़ैसला तुम्हें लेना है
की कोनसा किनारा चुनते हो तुम
ज़्यादा समये नही है
हमारे पास
नाव लिए मैं
खड़ा हूँ दूसरे
किनारे पर
सागर की तरफ जाने को

रूको ज़रा
एक बात ओर बात
इस पार आओ तो
पुराने रिश्तों
दोस्तियों को
उस पार ही छोड़ आना
की उनके बस का नहीं
इस बीहड़ ओर मुश्किल
रास्ते पर चलना

जल्दी करना
मेरे दोस्त

—साथी