Saying Goodbye…

People say saying goodbye is the most difficult thing to do. May be they are correct, may be not, all I know is not everyone gets a chance to say goodbye. Not everyone gets a chance to explore what something means to them before they had to let it go. I guess we were lucky, or maybe it was just impossible for us to let go without a proper goodbye, whatever might be the reason, I am glad we had those few days to bid adieu to a saga so long. I am glad we could feel the strong surge of the love that we shared one last time before we let the kites fly away, taking with it the remnants of our broken bond. 

To be able to feel the smoothness of your touch, the warmth of your embrace, the passion of your lips, I consider myself lucky. To have been in love with someone like you, to be loved by a heart like yours, I consider myself lucky. To have known serenity like you hold, to have soaked in the solace of your arms, I consider myself lucky. Lucky me it is, to have a chance to know it all, before I said goodbye. Lucky me to have one last chance to look deep into your eyes, and see love reflecting back in it, before I said goodbye. Your love was like the divine call of Krishna’s flute, that charmed the hearts of many; and yet in its depth it held a deep need for the love of its beloved. I am lucky that it had once called me in devotion and remembrance. I can leave with a smile because I know; even today somewhere in its depth lays the same emotion, the same pain that was mine years ago. 

Not everyone gets a second chance, but we did. Not once, but many times. We had to say a proper goodbye, had to cherish in each others’ smile before we could truly let go. I will always remember that wicked, crooked smile of yours, will always remember that smirk on your face when you teased me. I will remember that glint in your eyes when you studied my face. I will remember the way your hands wrapped around mine and held me steady. I will remember the depth of your voice, your expressions of anger, your tinkling laughter, the tingle of your touch. I will remember you, as a person, as a memory, and most importantly, as a part of my heart, as a pillar of my existence. How could I have let go without knowing you, the real you? After all, I had loved you for as long as I had known the word love. I had loved you more than I could understand. I had loved you with a passion that consumed me, inside and out, till all that was left of me, was my love for you. To leave tha t love behind without a proper farewell, I don’t think that was possible.

It was surreal the moments I spent with you. Those last days of our fairy tale made me believe we were stronger than fate. It made me think that we were meant to be forever. I guess I was delusional, but that is what your love does to me. It took me till the very last minute to understand, it was not our union but our farewell. We were brought together to let go. Yes it hurt, to tell you goodbye, to see your retreating back disappear into the crowd. It hurt to wave my hand, a smile on my lip as the tears flew unabashedly. Even though I couldn’t see it, I knew a similar smile graced your lips. You felt it too, you knew this was goodbye. And in your heart you were glad to have met me, to have loved me. I knew because I could sense it in your touch; hear it in the slightly wavering voice of yours. Yes we were sad, but our smiles were genuine, because deep in our hearts we were glad to be able to bid adieu. We were lucky we got the chance, a memory we will cherish and p rotect forever; that memory of saying goodbye. 

Ankita Acharya

KIIT School Of Biotechnology